It's really been a minute since i've blogged or even read blogs. The train of life seems to be larger and faster than my train of thought lately. i've been encountering new horizons at every turn, whether it's at home, with my other people's, or at work.
before i continue, i emplore ya'll to check this site NeosoulCafe.com it is definitely playing some good music. Soul music. Why is it only black artist seem to be able to produce soul music? what, white folk are soulless? hmmm...
Anyways. I heard today in reports that American Movie Classic (AMC) channel broadcasted the movie, Birth of a Nation, last night. In Atlanta one of the morning show host, was upset about its showing, and the portrayal of Black folks in the movie. it cast a deeply disparaging view of an America where "we" are allowed to be free. We rape white women, are shiftless, lazy, good for nothings. We are considered renegades... until the Mighty KKKlan arrives on the scene to tame the "wild beasts".
So i listen to this radio host knocking the broadcast of such a vile piece, in todays modern era. How this movie can affect race relations, and the like.
Then i say to myself... i coulda swore this was the same host i hear playing self-denegrating music on the radio, and in the clubs he deejays. the same host i called once before because their morning local school "shout out" list aired adjacent to a Captain Morgans/Alcoholic Kool-Aid commercial. The hypocrisy is running rampant, and the number of messages we are sending to the youth, and the adults are ridiculous. And the message that usually gets heard, is the one with a finger snap on the track, or the one with Lil' Jon screamin' on it, or the one that has the catchy hook, the hook that is geared towards pre-schoolers.
We sometimes shout at the blatant signs of racism, but do little about the more subversive acts of it. Why?
Do we really think we have the power if "we" are the ones calling ourselves lazy, whoremongering, irresponsible people? i guess as long as it ain't nobody but us doing it, it's okay.
Peace.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Monday, April 24, 2006
"It's been a long time, i shouldn't have left you..."- Rakim
What is up my people? I've been on hiatus for a few days so now i'm back to breathe some of that good blogosphere air. I know ya'll have been awaiting my return on pens and needles, so wait no more.
The last week has been a kinda vacation and a metamorphosis. Aside from one of my homeboys from high school coming down to visit and helping take me back to the essence of myself, wifey and i had a nice little talk about some things. I am feeling a lot more optimistic about my future than i did when i wrote the piece i wrote prior to this post.
Nothing does the body better than a renewal of the spirit. When your spirit is fresh and revived... age can do very little to prevent forward movement.
So as you all bask in the light that is currently eminating from my persons... I hope you all feel the light, see the light, and be the light.
Peace.
The last week has been a kinda vacation and a metamorphosis. Aside from one of my homeboys from high school coming down to visit and helping take me back to the essence of myself, wifey and i had a nice little talk about some things. I am feeling a lot more optimistic about my future than i did when i wrote the piece i wrote prior to this post.
Nothing does the body better than a renewal of the spirit. When your spirit is fresh and revived... age can do very little to prevent forward movement.
So as you all bask in the light that is currently eminating from my persons... I hope you all feel the light, see the light, and be the light.
Peace.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Everybody's Everything; My Own Nothing
A few posts ago Nikki posted a question asking people if they have ever had an epiphany. I did, so... "i wrote a song-about-it. wanna-here-it? here-it-go...."
"I got t'ree jobs, mon!"
Not really but that's one of my favorite In Living Color bits,
I never knew if Jamaican people found that offensive, though.
I am a husband
I am a father,
I am a lover,
I am also a brother,
I am a, so called, "good son" to my father and mother.
I am a buffer, and a rebuffer.
I am not the middle child, but
I am the child in the middle.
I am a counseler,
I am a consoler,
I am a cooler of hot heads,
I am a voice of reason,
I am a Cheerleader
I am a Loan Officer,
I am a Peace Maker,
I am a Spiritual Adviser, and
I am the Devil's advocate.
I am everybody's everything,
I am my own nothing.
Peace.
"thank-ya-very-much!"-- in living color.
"I got t'ree jobs, mon!"
Not really but that's one of my favorite In Living Color bits,
I never knew if Jamaican people found that offensive, though.
I am a husband
I am a father,
I am a lover,
I am also a brother,
I am a, so called, "good son" to my father and mother.
I am a buffer, and a rebuffer.
I am not the middle child, but
I am the child in the middle.
I am a counseler,
I am a consoler,
I am a cooler of hot heads,
I am a voice of reason,
I am a Cheerleader
I am a Loan Officer,
I am a Peace Maker,
I am a Spiritual Adviser, and
I am the Devil's advocate.
I am everybody's everything,
I am my own nothing.
Peace.
"thank-ya-very-much!"-- in living color.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Questions Pt. 3
Hello all! I know you've all been waiting to see what other Verses lay in the mind of me. now that i look at that past line, it sounds kinda corny, forgive me. But yeah, here a few more things that have entered my mind lately and have not left yet so i'll share, but i ask that ya'll share as well. Like i always say "each one, teach one" so take me to school. Aight?
Why is a new Georgia law about to make it open season on shooting Black males?
Well, Georgia has gone the way of several other states like, Texas, Florida, and Louisiana, with a new "Shoot First Law". Notice that these all happen to be southern states? Well what the law basically says is that; if you feel "threatened" by another person, whether your in you home, car, or any public place, you have the legal right to discharge your firearm into the "threatening person" without the fear of prosecution. This law will require people to no longer avoid confrontation, or seek refuge when confronted with a "threatening" character.
Okay let's define "threat". Now, after thinking about who I've ever really considered a threat to my persons, and my mind began to click. Click, click, click. Then i realized i've never felt my life threatened. Not even the time i was standing in a gas station while it was being robbed. And then I thought on the greater scale, who are the biggest, or the perceived biggest, threats in Georgia, or any other state. Black Men! So from my deductive reasoning, i basically take this law to say that, "white people. you no longer have to cross to the other side of the street when you see a group or "gang" of Black Men walking towards you!" I could be wrong, but in the next few years i'm expecting to hear of a lot more cases of justifiable homocide.
What do ya'll think? Am i just stuck in "black thought", or do you think this is a likely scenario?
Peace.
For more info on the law click here . Peace Out!
Why is a new Georgia law about to make it open season on shooting Black males?
Well, Georgia has gone the way of several other states like, Texas, Florida, and Louisiana, with a new "Shoot First Law". Notice that these all happen to be southern states? Well what the law basically says is that; if you feel "threatened" by another person, whether your in you home, car, or any public place, you have the legal right to discharge your firearm into the "threatening person" without the fear of prosecution. This law will require people to no longer avoid confrontation, or seek refuge when confronted with a "threatening" character.
Okay let's define "threat". Now, after thinking about who I've ever really considered a threat to my persons, and my mind began to click. Click, click, click. Then i realized i've never felt my life threatened. Not even the time i was standing in a gas station while it was being robbed. And then I thought on the greater scale, who are the biggest, or the perceived biggest, threats in Georgia, or any other state. Black Men! So from my deductive reasoning, i basically take this law to say that, "white people. you no longer have to cross to the other side of the street when you see a group or "gang" of Black Men walking towards you!" I could be wrong, but in the next few years i'm expecting to hear of a lot more cases of justifiable homocide.
What do ya'll think? Am i just stuck in "black thought", or do you think this is a likely scenario?
Peace.
For more info on the law click here . Peace Out!
Monday, April 03, 2006
Untitled joint i spoke.
These are the lyrics for a audio post i created a few days ago.
My soliloquies,
speak of tranquility.
You feelin' me?
All i ask is you be real with me,
but you instead you tend to do the opposite,
we can't chill on the boat for a day, without one of us rockin' it.
i ain't knockin' it
i'm jus sayin',
know-what-i'm-sayin'?
Must not cuz we delayin',
sprayin',
negative vibes in each other's space bubble.
can we go a whole day without lookin' in the face of trouble?
cuz we always on the News,
singin' the white man's blues,
wearing the white man's blues,
while the white man blew your dreams out the window.
have you thinkin' thats the end,
though,
the chance get slimmer,
and the tunnel light gets dimmer,
we all have God to lighten us,
and each other to enlighten us.
Peace.
My soliloquies,
speak of tranquility.
You feelin' me?
All i ask is you be real with me,
but you instead you tend to do the opposite,
we can't chill on the boat for a day, without one of us rockin' it.
i ain't knockin' it
i'm jus sayin',
know-what-i'm-sayin'?
Must not cuz we delayin',
sprayin',
negative vibes in each other's space bubble.
can we go a whole day without lookin' in the face of trouble?
cuz we always on the News,
singin' the white man's blues,
wearing the white man's blues,
while the white man blew your dreams out the window.
have you thinkin' thats the end,
though,
the chance get slimmer,
and the tunnel light gets dimmer,
we all have God to lighten us,
and each other to enlighten us.
Peace.
Thursday, March 30, 2006
The Questions... Pt. 2
Okay now back to my questions. If you didn't read my first five check them out below.
Why do we believe marriage is supposed to work?
Why are we one of the few creatures on earth that actually "attempt" to practice a life long monogamous relationship? If you look at the behaivor and practices of the animal on earth they choose their mate for the season and after that it's on to the next. There are a few animals that kill their mates after procreation, and I definitely don't condone that, but I think we should consider the institution of marriage and it's purpose in human existence.
If you think about the fact that more than 50% of marriages will end in divorce, and increasing daily, you get the idea that people don't want to be held captive to just one person for life. This is why I laugh and shake my head when I meet women looking for "Mr. Right", because it's like looking for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. It just doesn't exist.
I can't believe that there is one person that contains all the attributes that one desires in a soulmate. I did a list of things I'd like in my mate and I'm lucky to have 3 or 4 in any one person. So what do I do? Do I just keep looking for that complete package, or do I deny myself the enjoyment of qualities?
Why has pornography pervaded every orifice of technology?
Okay, if you read my recent material you know I enjoy porn. I believe it's a healthy relationship, so hey, don't hate! Now, as much as I like appreciate the internet's infinite supply of every possible and concievable type of porn, I think we might have begin being concerned. I really appreciate the fact that I don't have to go to a special store, where I have to park around back, just to get the latest movies. And porn has always been here, from cave drawings to silent film, but recently it's gotten out of hand.
As of now, there probably is no single technological multimedia invention that has not be touched by it. I mean, cell phones, computers, magazines, t.v., satelite radio, in-dash and seat mounted car dvd players, and now even iPods. iPod!! Now we can walk down the street and watch a porno, or while waiting for the school bus. Part of me says "I wish I were in high school right about now" and part of me is glad i'm not. Primarily because stimulation overload and no place for release wouldn't be good for a 16 year old me.
So now we got access to porn, and no way to slow it down. And I'm aware of the consequences of a society that doesn't have a tight grip on the leash of morality, i.e. Sodom and Gomorrah, but who wants somebody else upholding a moral standard, that you may or may not endorse? So we are left to wait for what will be the next technological device for our viewing or listening pleasure. One day we'll see how this all play out...
hopefully there's no "money shot". LOL. that was wrong...
Peace OUT!
one last little rant... why is there porn of the Simpson's? i'm mean come on! really, The Simpson's?
Peace.
Why do we believe marriage is supposed to work?
Why are we one of the few creatures on earth that actually "attempt" to practice a life long monogamous relationship? If you look at the behaivor and practices of the animal on earth they choose their mate for the season and after that it's on to the next. There are a few animals that kill their mates after procreation, and I definitely don't condone that, but I think we should consider the institution of marriage and it's purpose in human existence.
If you think about the fact that more than 50% of marriages will end in divorce, and increasing daily, you get the idea that people don't want to be held captive to just one person for life. This is why I laugh and shake my head when I meet women looking for "Mr. Right", because it's like looking for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. It just doesn't exist.
I can't believe that there is one person that contains all the attributes that one desires in a soulmate. I did a list of things I'd like in my mate and I'm lucky to have 3 or 4 in any one person. So what do I do? Do I just keep looking for that complete package, or do I deny myself the enjoyment of qualities?
Why has pornography pervaded every orifice of technology?
Okay, if you read my recent material you know I enjoy porn. I believe it's a healthy relationship, so hey, don't hate! Now, as much as I like appreciate the internet's infinite supply of every possible and concievable type of porn, I think we might have begin being concerned. I really appreciate the fact that I don't have to go to a special store, where I have to park around back, just to get the latest movies. And porn has always been here, from cave drawings to silent film, but recently it's gotten out of hand.
As of now, there probably is no single technological multimedia invention that has not be touched by it. I mean, cell phones, computers, magazines, t.v., satelite radio, in-dash and seat mounted car dvd players, and now even iPods. iPod!! Now we can walk down the street and watch a porno, or while waiting for the school bus. Part of me says "I wish I were in high school right about now" and part of me is glad i'm not. Primarily because stimulation overload and no place for release wouldn't be good for a 16 year old me.
So now we got access to porn, and no way to slow it down. And I'm aware of the consequences of a society that doesn't have a tight grip on the leash of morality, i.e. Sodom and Gomorrah, but who wants somebody else upholding a moral standard, that you may or may not endorse? So we are left to wait for what will be the next technological device for our viewing or listening pleasure. One day we'll see how this all play out...
hopefully there's no "money shot". LOL. that was wrong...
Peace OUT!
one last little rant... why is there porn of the Simpson's? i'm mean come on! really, The Simpson's?
Peace.
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
The Questions... Pt. 1
With all the talk of list and tags askin' about the type of women I want, or what I want to do before i die i decided to write some questions, and possible answers that have been perplexing me as of late. Enjoy.
Let's say I'm a die hard Christian, and really thankful for Jesus in my life, and praise Him and all. Does that mean I should be thankful for slavery, to some degree?
I mean, i know it's a stretch. Millions of us Black people in America are direct descendents of slaves, and most of us Christian. Now, we got that religion from White folks and were persecuted under their belief in it, because they (white folks) thought the Bible told them enslavement of the Africans was justified.
So if we pray to this God of the Bible, and thank him for "saving" us, and believe that we have nothing if we don't have him. Then doesn't it go to say that without the chain of events that unfurled, we would be in Africa dying and suffering for our sins? So.... we should thank white people for giving us this religion, even though it was pretty f'd up how they introduced it?
Why do I love chicks with naturals so much?
I remember back when I was at FAMU i'd look past a lot of chicks just to check out the one with the locs, or the low ceasar, or an afro puff. And whats funny all my homeboys would look around and the same room of chicks and say, "there you go" whenever the saw a chick with a natural. My last girlfriend rocked a perm the first year of our relationship, and then one day she surprised me and cut off her hair, and rocked the ceasar. She looked like 10 times better after that.
My current belief is that it's still not culturally typical, acceptable to have a natural, and i like anything that goes against the establishment.
Why do the women of Africa have the smoothest skin I've ever seen?
I was watching a program on women of Somalia, and I couldn't help but notice that the women, even the young one's of pubescent age, had some flawless looking skin. And with all the stress and strife they deal with in thier lives, you would expect it to show, but it doesn't.
Probably because of all the "garbage" we put into our bodies in this country and all the toxins we ingest and inhale, we are unlikely to have the level of perfection in our skin.
Why are Brazillian women so damn fine?
I don't know if I'm jumping on th Snoop and Pharrell band wagon here, but I've been seeing pictures and videos with these women, and I can't help but say "Damn!". It's ridiculous. I hope my enamourment is not based on the eurocentric standard of beauty, but more the Africanity of their features. I haven't figured it out yet. But not everything is worth disecting, sometimes its good not to overanalyze and enjoy the scenery.
Why do people assume I'm born on Christmas?
Ok, let me start of by saying my last name is Christmas... Now, typically your last name comes from your father, who gets his from his father. But for some damn reason a lot of people, mostly white, have to ask either, "where did you get that last name from?" or "were you born on Christmas?". To which I usually say, "From my daddy, ya' damn fool!" or "You don't get last names based on your birthday ya' idiot!", at least that what I say in my head.
My new verbal response is more sarcastic than that. I usually just give them a little genealogy lesson, stating basically that as far as I know we were once OWNED by some white folks in Virginia, and they gave us the name. I guess white people forget about that part in history when they ask question like to Black people.
well that's all for now, more later. Peace OUT!
Let's say I'm a die hard Christian, and really thankful for Jesus in my life, and praise Him and all. Does that mean I should be thankful for slavery, to some degree?
I mean, i know it's a stretch. Millions of us Black people in America are direct descendents of slaves, and most of us Christian. Now, we got that religion from White folks and were persecuted under their belief in it, because they (white folks) thought the Bible told them enslavement of the Africans was justified.
So if we pray to this God of the Bible, and thank him for "saving" us, and believe that we have nothing if we don't have him. Then doesn't it go to say that without the chain of events that unfurled, we would be in Africa dying and suffering for our sins? So.... we should thank white people for giving us this religion, even though it was pretty f'd up how they introduced it?
Why do I love chicks with naturals so much?
I remember back when I was at FAMU i'd look past a lot of chicks just to check out the one with the locs, or the low ceasar, or an afro puff. And whats funny all my homeboys would look around and the same room of chicks and say, "there you go" whenever the saw a chick with a natural. My last girlfriend rocked a perm the first year of our relationship, and then one day she surprised me and cut off her hair, and rocked the ceasar. She looked like 10 times better after that.
My current belief is that it's still not culturally typical, acceptable to have a natural, and i like anything that goes against the establishment.
Why do the women of Africa have the smoothest skin I've ever seen?
I was watching a program on women of Somalia, and I couldn't help but notice that the women, even the young one's of pubescent age, had some flawless looking skin. And with all the stress and strife they deal with in thier lives, you would expect it to show, but it doesn't.
Probably because of all the "garbage" we put into our bodies in this country and all the toxins we ingest and inhale, we are unlikely to have the level of perfection in our skin.
Why are Brazillian women so damn fine?
I don't know if I'm jumping on th Snoop and Pharrell band wagon here, but I've been seeing pictures and videos with these women, and I can't help but say "Damn!". It's ridiculous. I hope my enamourment is not based on the eurocentric standard of beauty, but more the Africanity of their features. I haven't figured it out yet. But not everything is worth disecting, sometimes its good not to overanalyze and enjoy the scenery.
Why do people assume I'm born on Christmas?
Ok, let me start of by saying my last name is Christmas... Now, typically your last name comes from your father, who gets his from his father. But for some damn reason a lot of people, mostly white, have to ask either, "where did you get that last name from?" or "were you born on Christmas?". To which I usually say, "From my daddy, ya' damn fool!" or "You don't get last names based on your birthday ya' idiot!", at least that what I say in my head.
My new verbal response is more sarcastic than that. I usually just give them a little genealogy lesson, stating basically that as far as I know we were once OWNED by some white folks in Virginia, and they gave us the name. I guess white people forget about that part in history when they ask question like to Black people.
well that's all for now, more later. Peace OUT!
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
10 things.
Rules:If I tag you, you have to do the following:
1. The tagged victim must come up with 10 different points of their perfect lover.
2. Need to mention gender of target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game and leave a comment saying they've been tagged.
4. If tagged again, there's no need to post a 2nd time.
I can basically sum up the perfect women in one statement, written by an artist named Ras Kass on a song entitled Soul On Ice. “I want a woman with the body of a whore and/ and attitude like Lauryn.” Now that sounds vague, simple and kinda typical for a man, but let me attempt to break that down.
1. The body of a whore.No need for an explanation. But let me do so anyways, before ya’ll get the wrong idea. By whore I don’t mean in the trashy, run-down, slutty dressing sense. I mean the type of check that just has everything, and in the right places. Not so much a model-type chick but a proportioned-type chick. And one who knows how that maintanence is important in keeping it together.
2. Attitude like Lauryn.
Now this portion is based strictly on what I percieved at one time Lauryn’s attitude to be like. With all the craziness surrounding her now, I might have to make adjustments to this. She basically just needs to be “cool”, in the sense that she should understand that all things come in cycle, so stressing or flippin’ out over unforseen circumstances is useless, and will only affect you in the long run.
3. Music.
This is the cornerstone of any strong relationship with me. An appreciation of my music. I don’t necessarily expect all women to up on Little Brother, or Mos Def, or whoever, but just open your ears to it. I don’t want to hear “Cut that crap off” if I’m bumpin’ it in the whip or something. Ya’ might get kicked out the ride for that. Plus a fan of soul music. See #2
4. Trust and honesty.
I guess these are important. Everybody says they are, so I guess they are. Sometimes I don’t feel like hearing the truth, I am human, and sometimes the truth eff’n sucks. It’s good to be in the Matrix every once in a while. But mostly the truth is good if not a great way to keep a relationship moving forward.
5. Compassion.
Compassion for human suffering, and for the basic needs of all people. The realization that all people need an advocate, and the willingness to be that advocate. See #2
6. Understanding.
Understanding of every Man’s basic “needs”. We all know what these needs are, so there’s really no need to elaborate. Women just need to know that sex is a drug, not a weapon, and as with any addiction, it will take more of that “drug” to satisfy the urges of it. So be conscious of that.
7. Open-minded.
Being open-minded, to me, is a very attractive trait. The willingness to step away from the traditional school of thought, and considering embracing a new and alternative one, will win my affection all by itself. This partially relates to item #2 and #3.
8. Self sustaining.
I like women who don’t need a man to complete them. The type of chick who will go to the mall by herself, or will go treat herself to nice dinner. Sometimes we need that space.
9. Sense of Humor.
I like to crack jokes and have fun laughing at silly stuff. There is a time and a place to be serious, but I go with the old addage, “Laughter is the best medicine”.
10. And last but definitely not least a healthy respect for Porn.
I think so many women tend to think that these “skin flicks” are dirty, sinful pieces of entertainment with no redeeming qualities. I don’t agree, I actually believe this world would be a much worse place without the genre. “Embrace the Porn” that’s what I say. Not really but at least don’t pull out the crucifixes when you come across one.
I really have no other requirements for women, except that you adopt and embrace the language from my previous post on what our children should be exposed to.
now, do i know 8 bloggers? i don't think so. so if you get tagged by me, deal with it! just jokin'.
NY to UK
Random Thoughts
Ms. GeorgiaPeach
Ms. Nikki
The Accomplice
N Search of Ecstatsy
Josie from Trini
Abeni
1. The tagged victim must come up with 10 different points of their perfect lover.
2. Need to mention gender of target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game and leave a comment saying they've been tagged.
4. If tagged again, there's no need to post a 2nd time.
I can basically sum up the perfect women in one statement, written by an artist named Ras Kass on a song entitled Soul On Ice. “I want a woman with the body of a whore and/ and attitude like Lauryn.” Now that sounds vague, simple and kinda typical for a man, but let me attempt to break that down.
1. The body of a whore.No need for an explanation. But let me do so anyways, before ya’ll get the wrong idea. By whore I don’t mean in the trashy, run-down, slutty dressing sense. I mean the type of check that just has everything, and in the right places. Not so much a model-type chick but a proportioned-type chick. And one who knows how that maintanence is important in keeping it together.
2. Attitude like Lauryn.
Now this portion is based strictly on what I percieved at one time Lauryn’s attitude to be like. With all the craziness surrounding her now, I might have to make adjustments to this. She basically just needs to be “cool”, in the sense that she should understand that all things come in cycle, so stressing or flippin’ out over unforseen circumstances is useless, and will only affect you in the long run.
3. Music.
This is the cornerstone of any strong relationship with me. An appreciation of my music. I don’t necessarily expect all women to up on Little Brother, or Mos Def, or whoever, but just open your ears to it. I don’t want to hear “Cut that crap off” if I’m bumpin’ it in the whip or something. Ya’ might get kicked out the ride for that. Plus a fan of soul music. See #2
4. Trust and honesty.
I guess these are important. Everybody says they are, so I guess they are. Sometimes I don’t feel like hearing the truth, I am human, and sometimes the truth eff’n sucks. It’s good to be in the Matrix every once in a while. But mostly the truth is good if not a great way to keep a relationship moving forward.
5. Compassion.
Compassion for human suffering, and for the basic needs of all people. The realization that all people need an advocate, and the willingness to be that advocate. See #2
6. Understanding.
Understanding of every Man’s basic “needs”. We all know what these needs are, so there’s really no need to elaborate. Women just need to know that sex is a drug, not a weapon, and as with any addiction, it will take more of that “drug” to satisfy the urges of it. So be conscious of that.
7. Open-minded.
Being open-minded, to me, is a very attractive trait. The willingness to step away from the traditional school of thought, and considering embracing a new and alternative one, will win my affection all by itself. This partially relates to item #2 and #3.
8. Self sustaining.
I like women who don’t need a man to complete them. The type of chick who will go to the mall by herself, or will go treat herself to nice dinner. Sometimes we need that space.
9. Sense of Humor.
I like to crack jokes and have fun laughing at silly stuff. There is a time and a place to be serious, but I go with the old addage, “Laughter is the best medicine”.
10. And last but definitely not least a healthy respect for Porn.
I think so many women tend to think that these “skin flicks” are dirty, sinful pieces of entertainment with no redeeming qualities. I don’t agree, I actually believe this world would be a much worse place without the genre. “Embrace the Porn” that’s what I say. Not really but at least don’t pull out the crucifixes when you come across one.
I really have no other requirements for women, except that you adopt and embrace the language from my previous post on what our children should be exposed to.
now, do i know 8 bloggers? i don't think so. so if you get tagged by me, deal with it! just jokin'.
NY to UK
Random Thoughts
Ms. GeorgiaPeach
Ms. Nikki
The Accomplice
N Search of Ecstatsy
Josie from Trini
Abeni
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Is it possible?
One quick question... I'm wondering if it's at all possible for men to be "on their period". I mean i know not biologically it's not, but emotionally. Like for example a few weeks ago I wrote some things to someone, who may have considered me a friend, and I consider her one as well. But, yeah, so i go off on this rant, which at the time seemed very logical, and purposeful, and the truth. I emoted like i have rarely done, ever.
So anyways, i ranted and i sent the email rant to this person, and they responded and i replied, and i tried to clarify my previous rant, which probably was just as confusing and the original one. A few days later i ended up going through my email box and i decided to read what i had written and came to realize that i was "eff'n trippin"!
This leads me to wonder, "was i on my period?" Let me know what ya'll think. Peace.
Oh yeah, to the person this is concerning, I want to appologize... Peace.
So anyways, i ranted and i sent the email rant to this person, and they responded and i replied, and i tried to clarify my previous rant, which probably was just as confusing and the original one. A few days later i ended up going through my email box and i decided to read what i had written and came to realize that i was "eff'n trippin"!
This leads me to wonder, "was i on my period?" Let me know what ya'll think. Peace.
Oh yeah, to the person this is concerning, I want to appologize... Peace.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Monday, March 06, 2006
5 Things...
There are hundreds of different lists posted on peoples sites. Most of these list discuss topics ranging from music to sex history. So I've decided to enter the realm of list posting.
Only thing is my list will be a list of thing to do before you die. Not in the "visit Europe" or "be successful" sense of the word, but in the "pass this on to your future generations" sense. Aside from our religious or moral convictions I think that there is a lot of information that we need to pass along, in order to further the "cause" for Black people in the U.S. So without further ado:
5 Things We Should Show Our Children
Only thing is my list will be a list of thing to do before you die. Not in the "visit Europe" or "be successful" sense of the word, but in the "pass this on to your future generations" sense. Aside from our religious or moral convictions I think that there is a lot of information that we need to pass along, in order to further the "cause" for Black people in the U.S. So without further ado:
5 Things We Should Show Our Children
- "Willie Lynch Letter"-- I know by this point many have either read or heard this letter, and some have discounted the importance of its effects on the condition of modern Blacks. But the letter is one of the most important documents on the systematic distraction of a people to date. Not since the letters of Jeffrey Amherst discussing the destruction of Native American Indians by offering them blankets infected with Small Pox, has their been documentation that so affected a people or that told of the crimes that would be perpetrated against them. The Lynch letters authenticity has been in question recently and the fact that it could possibly be fake is inconsequential. It still has the ability to simply enlighten us to the ways of Black people and those mental disorders we suffer from.
- "The Spook Who Sat By The Door"-- This book, written by Sam Greenlee, is valuable to all those interested in seeing the true power that Black America could possess. Not to say that the means used by the main character in this book is the only way for Black people to gain power in this country, but the methodology by which he did it might be. What I feel this movie suggest, is to do as we have been preaching to each other forever, "Each one, Teach one", and "Give back to your community." Meaning, that we should take what we learn at our schools and jobs, and use that to create new opportunities in our own communities. There is also a movie from the same title, but books always have been a more thorough way of passing information.
- Without Sanctuary: Lynching Photography in America-- The faces placed on the greatest crime in this countries history will never leave you after opening this book, and they never should. These images are, in my opinion, as important as the one's showing Jesus Christ's crucifixion. That may sound preposterous to some, but without being able to see expressions on the faces of our ancestors, whether that is the role of victim or victimizer, it will not be possible to connect on a human level with this chapter in our history. The same way the movie "The Passion" attempts to show us, visually the suffering Jesus endured on behalf of our souls, these photo's depict those men, women, children, and unborn children's suffering on behalf ideology of some in this country. One will bring you closer to God, and the other closer to Yourself.
- The Collective works of Malcolm X-- Malcolm X is an often denigrated, amazingly, Civil Rights leader. His ideas on the use force, contradicted those of Martin Luther King's, as a way of combating the ills of racism, were unwelcome in many social circles during his time. Because of that many of his teachings are put in to one soundbite "By any means necessary". But he was very dynamic and spoke on all issues, most of which affect us to this very day. He primarily attempted to drive us toward, as aPeople, to the idea of self-sufficiency. It is really important that his values be put on display to future generations, because of the fact that they are alternative to the MLK approach which is often praised in this country. Our children will need that information in order to make accurate assessments of how to address this countries social, political and economical ills. Speeches, books and some movies have all accurately depicted his life, and even his change from the more radical ideology of the Nation of Islam, to that which he arrived at late in his young life.
- Appreciation of the Black Woman-- Above all the items mentioned in this blog, this has to be the most pivotal. For without women who have been respected, admired, inspired, educated, enlightened, guided, and supported, we will never have a generation to which we can inform of the issues previously stated. Women are the first teachers, and the first loves of our children. They have the power to move a movement, and once we begin to adopt a philosophy and a psychology that recognizes that, we will continue our slow decline, aside from the modest individual gains of a few in our society.
Now, with that all said, I admit that, for the most part these are just my opinions. I also must say that my list is only 5 deep, obviously I have many more things I feel should be carried into the future, but it wouldn't be a pretty site to see everything. Plus "the man" is out there watching. I'm sure drawn into a conversation on it, I would probably expound upon it. So if you want to discuss it more, I'm all ears.
Peace.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Yin Yang
My daughter is a few weeks old now, and I find that her birth has inspired me to do a lot of quiet reflection. Reflection on the past nine months. Then the whole nine month processes culmination into this end-of-the-beginning, which was pretty euphoric for me. It's so euphoric that it helps me to understand my own desire to have as many children as my body, my wife, and my wallet can.
I remember when my son was born, and how my mind was flooded with things that I couldn't wait to teach him. The ability and responsibility to form and shape his young mind, seemed like an awesome opportunity to "live again" so to speak.
But I digress. Back to my subject of the day. My little princess. Along with the state of euphoria I've been feeling, there is yet another equally powerful depressive feeling that has arisen in me. The yang, to my yin is based in the encounters with women I've met throughout my life.
When I got to college, and began interacting with more women I began to get more and more knowledge about their secret lives. By "secret" I mean the mental and physical suffering some of them had experienced. The stories were so unbelievable to me, to think of all the things a man would do to a woman. And for the most part there was nothing they could do to protect themselves. That incenses me, and at the same time depresses me.
I have to, from jump, adopt a pro-active role, of course, but at the same time there is a sense of hopelessness that I have to accept. I long ago resolved to certain things for my own life (death, wealth, poverty, etc.), but to have to do that for your children is something I wasn't prepared for. It's not something I want to have to do. But I know that I have to for my own sanity.
I think educating myself on the subject will prove to help bring me out into the "light". So, I've decided to go to the library and check out some books on dealing and coping with raising girls. Allah Christmas
But alas in this "Cold, Cold World" we live in, and I'm going to have to remember that.
Peace.
If you have ideas on this please share. Peace.
I remember when my son was born, and how my mind was flooded with things that I couldn't wait to teach him. The ability and responsibility to form and shape his young mind, seemed like an awesome opportunity to "live again" so to speak.
But I digress. Back to my subject of the day. My little princess. Along with the state of euphoria I've been feeling, there is yet another equally powerful depressive feeling that has arisen in me. The yang, to my yin is based in the encounters with women I've met throughout my life.
When I got to college, and began interacting with more women I began to get more and more knowledge about their secret lives. By "secret" I mean the mental and physical suffering some of them had experienced. The stories were so unbelievable to me, to think of all the things a man would do to a woman. And for the most part there was nothing they could do to protect themselves. That incenses me, and at the same time depresses me.
I have to, from jump, adopt a pro-active role, of course, but at the same time there is a sense of hopelessness that I have to accept. I long ago resolved to certain things for my own life (death, wealth, poverty, etc.), but to have to do that for your children is something I wasn't prepared for. It's not something I want to have to do. But I know that I have to for my own sanity.
I think educating myself on the subject will prove to help bring me out into the "light". So, I've decided to go to the library and check out some books on dealing and coping with raising girls. Allah Christmas
But alas in this "Cold, Cold World" we live in, and I'm going to have to remember that.
Peace.
If you have ideas on this please share. Peace.
Yin Yang
My daughter is a few weeks old now, and I find that her birth has inspired me to do a lot of quiet reflection. Reflection on the past nine months. Then the whole nine month processes culmination into this end-of-the-beginning, which was pretty euphoric for me. It's so euphoric that it helps me to understand my own desire to have as many children as my body, my wife, and my wallet can.
I remember when my son was born, and how my mind was flooded with things that I couldn't wait to teach him. The ability and responsibility to form and shape his young mind, seemed like an awesome opportunity to "live again" so to speak.
But I digress. Back to my subject of the day. My little princess. Along with the state of euphoria I've been feeling, there is yet another equally powerful depressive feeling that has arisen in me. The yang, to my yin is based in the encounters with women I've met throughout my life.
When I got to college, and began interacting with more women I began to get more and more knowledge about their secret lives. By "secret" I mean the mental and physical suffering some of them had experienced. The stories were so unbelievable to me, to think of all the things a man would do to a woman. And for the most part there was nothing they could do to protect themselves. That incenses me, and at the same time depresses me.
I have to, from jump, adopt a pro-active role, of course, but at the same time there is a sense of hopelessness that I have to accept. I long ago resolved to certain things for my own life (death, wealth, poverty, etc.), but to have to do that for your children is something I wasn't prepared for. It's not something I want to have to do. But I know that I have to for my own sanity.
I think educating myself on the subject will prove to help bring me out into the "light". So, I've decided to go to the library and check out some books on dealing and coping with raising girls. Allah Christmas
But alas in this "Cold, Cold World" we live in, and I'm going to have to remember that.
Peace.
If you have ideas on this please share. Peace.
I remember when my son was born, and how my mind was flooded with things that I couldn't wait to teach him. The ability and responsibility to form and shape his young mind, seemed like an awesome opportunity to "live again" so to speak.
But I digress. Back to my subject of the day. My little princess. Along with the state of euphoria I've been feeling, there is yet another equally powerful depressive feeling that has arisen in me. The yang, to my yin is based in the encounters with women I've met throughout my life.
When I got to college, and began interacting with more women I began to get more and more knowledge about their secret lives. By "secret" I mean the mental and physical suffering some of them had experienced. The stories were so unbelievable to me, to think of all the things a man would do to a woman. And for the most part there was nothing they could do to protect themselves. That incenses me, and at the same time depresses me.
I have to, from jump, adopt a pro-active role, of course, but at the same time there is a sense of hopelessness that I have to accept. I long ago resolved to certain things for my own life (death, wealth, poverty, etc.), but to have to do that for your children is something I wasn't prepared for. It's not something I want to have to do. But I know that I have to for my own sanity.
I think educating myself on the subject will prove to help bring me out into the "light". So, I've decided to go to the library and check out some books on dealing and coping with raising girls. Allah Christmas
But alas in this "Cold, Cold World" we live in, and I'm going to have to remember that.
Peace.
If you have ideas on this please share. Peace.
Monday, February 27, 2006
Black and White
If none of ya'll visited the old WildSeed blog then you might not know of my ever growing love of Black & White photography. well in my brief hiatus i found myself snapping away again. i swear i'm gonna really spend more time looking through the lens. hope ya'll enjoy.
Also, but most definitely most important the newest edition to the Fam... Peace.
Also, but most definitely most important the newest edition to the Fam... Peace.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
Funny Story #2
So i heard the funniest story in my life the other day!
Okay here goes....
The vice president of the United States... Shot a dude in the FACE with a shotgun! And the funniest part of it all was that the Cops didn't even consider arresting him. Now if that's not funny i don't know what is.
man i was "LOL'n" and "LMAO" all over the place. I almost pee'd on myself after that one.
I don't think i could write a better script than the one that's being played out in this country right now.
Peace
Okay here goes....
The vice president of the United States... Shot a dude in the FACE with a shotgun! And the funniest part of it all was that the Cops didn't even consider arresting him. Now if that's not funny i don't know what is.
man i was "LOL'n" and "LMAO" all over the place. I almost pee'd on myself after that one.
I don't think i could write a better script than the one that's being played out in this country right now.
Peace
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Dating Stories
I was just reading Brea's blog on here possibly delving into the world of online dating. And that sparked some memories of my experiences with the internet and women, as well as other funny stuff that's happened to me. Like I've said on previous posts, memories are a hard thing to forget. So with that i begin...
Back in 1999, on May 29th a me and female that I had met on collegeclub decided we'd go out. Since my birthday was the next day, and my prospects were looking kinda slim for getting my annual "Birthday Sex", i figured, why not. Now, me and this chic spoke had spoken on the phone a few times prior than this meeting, and she always was talking freaky, and how cute she was, and all the things she would do to and for me. So i knew she'd be 'bout it. So we made our plan and she was to come by the crib, and we go to the movies. Mind you, I never saw a picture of this chic, since this was before digital camera's were big, and u had to actually go scan you photos in for them to be seen. So I never saw her picture, and I really never gave the idea of her looks much thought. I believe my horniness was guiding my actions back then.
So she finally comes by, and I look through the peep hole... and i notice that i can't see all of her in the peep hole... that's wasn't good. After standing there cursing myself for a minute, I opened the door. Now she was cute in the face, for a man of about 145 lbs. she was little too much women for me.
She came in saw the spot, and chilled for a minute. In my head I'm thinking of ways not to go to this movie, but she seemed to really want to make a date out of this. So we eventually left for the movie. I asked her to drive cause i didn't want to be spotted by any of my peoples. I even choose to go to see a bad movie at the $1 theatre.
We went to the show, and came back to the crib afterwards. We chilled on the couch for a bit, and it was funny cause she was trying to see if i was 'bout it. She was talking about the stuff she had promised to give me for my birthday, but I couldn't get my mind or body to go along with the dirty talk. I eventually had to use the "i don't have any protection" lie to shut down the conversation. She then decided to leave, and I... went to sleep.
What i learned from this event... is that when somebody's profile name contains the word "thickness" it's usually not this! Peace.
Back in 1999, on May 29th a me and female that I had met on collegeclub decided we'd go out. Since my birthday was the next day, and my prospects were looking kinda slim for getting my annual "Birthday Sex", i figured, why not. Now, me and this chic spoke had spoken on the phone a few times prior than this meeting, and she always was talking freaky, and how cute she was, and all the things she would do to and for me. So i knew she'd be 'bout it. So we made our plan and she was to come by the crib, and we go to the movies. Mind you, I never saw a picture of this chic, since this was before digital camera's were big, and u had to actually go scan you photos in for them to be seen. So I never saw her picture, and I really never gave the idea of her looks much thought. I believe my horniness was guiding my actions back then.
So she finally comes by, and I look through the peep hole... and i notice that i can't see all of her in the peep hole... that's wasn't good. After standing there cursing myself for a minute, I opened the door. Now she was cute in the face, for a man of about 145 lbs. she was little too much women for me.
She came in saw the spot, and chilled for a minute. In my head I'm thinking of ways not to go to this movie, but she seemed to really want to make a date out of this. So we eventually left for the movie. I asked her to drive cause i didn't want to be spotted by any of my peoples. I even choose to go to see a bad movie at the $1 theatre.
We went to the show, and came back to the crib afterwards. We chilled on the couch for a bit, and it was funny cause she was trying to see if i was 'bout it. She was talking about the stuff she had promised to give me for my birthday, but I couldn't get my mind or body to go along with the dirty talk. I eventually had to use the "i don't have any protection" lie to shut down the conversation. She then decided to leave, and I... went to sleep.
What i learned from this event... is that when somebody's profile name contains the word "thickness" it's usually not this! Peace.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Maybe the Revolution is being Televised...
I think I'm beginning to adopt a philosophy similar to my brother. At least on the issue of the brightness of our future.
I have, for a while viewed the future for Black people as a bleak one. One in which we never completely regrasp our Crowns and return to our original position on the world stage. I thought the quote "the meek shall inherit the earth" was a bit dated, and would not hold water against the legions of people who wish to destroy us.
But something my bro said to me is finally starting to make sense. I'm not able to directly quote him, but the gist of it was this, "...Look at T.V. Look at how we dominate sports, how so many young white kids idolize these athletes. See how Michael and Tiger have kids wanting to be them. Look at the music channels. When was the last time you even heard or saw a white group a singer get as much love as Beyonce' or Jay-Z or 50 cent? It's as if white people hardly have a music genre anymore. Rap music is becoming world music.
And because of this, future generations of white kids are gonna see the world through different eyes. They will more likely have listened to, and enjoyed some rap show or have Black friends simply based on "popular culture." So they will more readily empathize with our struggle, rather than with the disdain past generation have viewed us. "
Now, two months or so later, I get it. I can see that vision now, and some other things are making all the sense in the world now. Like Bill O'Reilly's constant bashing of Rap music. He's just trying to appeal to his white audiences' need to put the kibosh on this trend. I could even see the lack of Black programming and the poor production of shows geared towards us on the major networks as further evidence of this theory.
I know some people would say that there is no white conspiracy to undermine the Black population, or white america's acceptance of it. But I tend to disagree, not because I think they are holding weekly meetings on it, but because of nature, and psychology. I learned once that self-preservation is the driving force for people's actions. So with that in mind, it is natural for someone, especially in a position of power, to do what ever is necessary to preserve their way of life.
So to quote the old "Scorpion and the Frog" fable by Aesop, "I could not help myself. It is my nature."
Let me know what ya'll think. Peace.
I have, for a while viewed the future for Black people as a bleak one. One in which we never completely regrasp our Crowns and return to our original position on the world stage. I thought the quote "the meek shall inherit the earth" was a bit dated, and would not hold water against the legions of people who wish to destroy us.
But something my bro said to me is finally starting to make sense. I'm not able to directly quote him, but the gist of it was this, "...Look at T.V. Look at how we dominate sports, how so many young white kids idolize these athletes. See how Michael and Tiger have kids wanting to be them. Look at the music channels. When was the last time you even heard or saw a white group a singer get as much love as Beyonce' or Jay-Z or 50 cent? It's as if white people hardly have a music genre anymore. Rap music is becoming world music.
And because of this, future generations of white kids are gonna see the world through different eyes. They will more likely have listened to, and enjoyed some rap show or have Black friends simply based on "popular culture." So they will more readily empathize with our struggle, rather than with the disdain past generation have viewed us. "
Now, two months or so later, I get it. I can see that vision now, and some other things are making all the sense in the world now. Like Bill O'Reilly's constant bashing of Rap music. He's just trying to appeal to his white audiences' need to put the kibosh on this trend. I could even see the lack of Black programming and the poor production of shows geared towards us on the major networks as further evidence of this theory.
I know some people would say that there is no white conspiracy to undermine the Black population, or white america's acceptance of it. But I tend to disagree, not because I think they are holding weekly meetings on it, but because of nature, and psychology. I learned once that self-preservation is the driving force for people's actions. So with that in mind, it is natural for someone, especially in a position of power, to do what ever is necessary to preserve their way of life.
So to quote the old "Scorpion and the Frog" fable by Aesop, "I could not help myself. It is my nature."
Let me know what ya'll think. Peace.
Thursday, February 02, 2006
I Wish
You know, I wish I didn't know when the first of February was.
Our societies terrible attempt at trying to seamlessly blend in African-centered programming for 28 days, is so see-thru that I almost want to laugh.
Whats just as bad is BET has followed the same path as other channels.
Our societies terrible attempt at trying to seamlessly blend in African-centered programming for 28 days, is so see-thru that I almost want to laugh.
Whats just as bad is BET has followed the same path as other channels.
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Music Tag
1) A favorite political track.
Beef – Mos Def
with lines like, “beef is not was Jay said to Nas/ Beef is when the workin’ folks can’t find jobs…”
2) One of those tracks that make you dance on the dancefloor no matter what.
Peanut Butter Jelly Time – Buckwheat Boys
yeah i’m a Floridian… What?
3) The song you’d use to tell someone you love them.
Nothing Even Matters – Lauryn Hill ft. D’angelo
this song describes how love should feel. “These buildings could drift out to sea/ Some natural catastrophe/Still there’s no place I’d rather be/cause nothing even matters to me”.
4) A song that has made you sit down and analyze it’s lyrics.
Welcome to Jamrock – Damien Marley
The whole song is worth analyzing, but these lines are some of my favorites. “Come on let's face it, a ghetto education's basic/ A most a the youths them waste it/ And when they waste it/ that's when they take the guns and replace it”
5) A song that you like, that a two year old would like as well.
Just to get by – Talib Kweli
I caught my son singing this at 2, so I guess it works.
6) A song that gives you an energy boost.
Kryptonite (I be on it) – Purple Ribbon Allstars
I could be in REM sleep at 2 a.m., and if this came on I’d jump and do my head nod.
7) A song that you and your grandparents (would probably) like.
Anything from B.B. King
I’m a Mississippi boy at heart.
8) A song that you really liked when you were 14-16, and still really like now.
It ain’t hard to tell – Nas
Self explanatory
9) A sad song that would be in the soundtrack of the movie about your life.
Never can say goodbye – Jackson 5
couple of years in there during some relationships. For some reasons my sad times are always came during relationships.
10) A peppy song that would start the opening credits of the movie about your life.
Umi Says – Mos Def
”my umi says shine your light on the world/ shine your light for the world to see.”
11) A good song from a genre of music that no one would guess that you liked.
The man in black – Jonny Cash
my favorite lines in the song are “I wear the black for the poor and the beaten down/ Livin' in the hopeless, hungry side of town/ I wear it for the prisoner who has long paid for his crime/ But is there because he's a victim of the times.” And the last line “'Til things are brighter, I'm the Man In Black”
12) A song that you think should have been playing when you were born.
Step into a world – KRS-One
"Step into a world, where hip-hop is me..."
13) A favorite artist duo collaboration.
BlackStar album
14) A favorite song that you completely disagree with (politically, morally,
commonsenically, religiously etc.)
give me that p---y – Lil Webbie
first of all… how does this song get on the radio?? And what is up with lines like… damn, I can’t even isolate a line. Song Lyrics . They are all borderline “rape” lines. Definitely not a Dirty South song I can feel.
15) The song that you like despite the fact your IQ level drops several points
every time you listen to it.
”if it's too stupid, i ain't listening to it”- Nikki. I agree with that.
16) Your smooth song, for relaxing.
This is a Mans World- James Brown
this song has been sucessful lately at mellowing me out.
17) A song you would send to someone you hate or are mad at.
Threats – Jay Z
”Put that knife in ya/ take a little bit of life from ya”. That’s whats up.
18) A favorite track from an outfit considered a “super-group.”
Vocab - Fugees
The beginning of my love for Lauryn's rhyme skills.
19) A song that makes you reminsce about good times with a family member.
Don’t remember the songs names, but when my brother I could first club together, we had a dance to it.
20) Your favorite song at this moment in time.
I put a spell on you – Nina Simone
It just puts me to sleep.
Beef – Mos Def
with lines like, “beef is not was Jay said to Nas/ Beef is when the workin’ folks can’t find jobs…”
2) One of those tracks that make you dance on the dancefloor no matter what.
Peanut Butter Jelly Time – Buckwheat Boys
yeah i’m a Floridian… What?
3) The song you’d use to tell someone you love them.
Nothing Even Matters – Lauryn Hill ft. D’angelo
this song describes how love should feel. “These buildings could drift out to sea/ Some natural catastrophe/Still there’s no place I’d rather be/cause nothing even matters to me”.
4) A song that has made you sit down and analyze it’s lyrics.
Welcome to Jamrock – Damien Marley
The whole song is worth analyzing, but these lines are some of my favorites. “Come on let's face it, a ghetto education's basic/ A most a the youths them waste it/ And when they waste it/ that's when they take the guns and replace it”
5) A song that you like, that a two year old would like as well.
Just to get by – Talib Kweli
I caught my son singing this at 2, so I guess it works.
6) A song that gives you an energy boost.
Kryptonite (I be on it) – Purple Ribbon Allstars
I could be in REM sleep at 2 a.m., and if this came on I’d jump and do my head nod.
7) A song that you and your grandparents (would probably) like.
Anything from B.B. King
I’m a Mississippi boy at heart.
8) A song that you really liked when you were 14-16, and still really like now.
It ain’t hard to tell – Nas
Self explanatory
9) A sad song that would be in the soundtrack of the movie about your life.
Never can say goodbye – Jackson 5
couple of years in there during some relationships. For some reasons my sad times are always came during relationships.
10) A peppy song that would start the opening credits of the movie about your life.
Umi Says – Mos Def
”my umi says shine your light on the world/ shine your light for the world to see.”
11) A good song from a genre of music that no one would guess that you liked.
The man in black – Jonny Cash
my favorite lines in the song are “I wear the black for the poor and the beaten down/ Livin' in the hopeless, hungry side of town/ I wear it for the prisoner who has long paid for his crime/ But is there because he's a victim of the times.” And the last line “'Til things are brighter, I'm the Man In Black”
12) A song that you think should have been playing when you were born.
Step into a world – KRS-One
"Step into a world, where hip-hop is me..."
13) A favorite artist duo collaboration.
BlackStar album
14) A favorite song that you completely disagree with (politically, morally,
commonsenically, religiously etc.)
give me that p---y – Lil Webbie
first of all… how does this song get on the radio?? And what is up with lines like… damn, I can’t even isolate a line. Song Lyrics . They are all borderline “rape” lines. Definitely not a Dirty South song I can feel.
15) The song that you like despite the fact your IQ level drops several points
every time you listen to it.
”if it's too stupid, i ain't listening to it”- Nikki. I agree with that.
16) Your smooth song, for relaxing.
This is a Mans World- James Brown
this song has been sucessful lately at mellowing me out.
17) A song you would send to someone you hate or are mad at.
Threats – Jay Z
”Put that knife in ya/ take a little bit of life from ya”. That’s whats up.
18) A favorite track from an outfit considered a “super-group.”
Vocab - Fugees
The beginning of my love for Lauryn's rhyme skills.
19) A song that makes you reminsce about good times with a family member.
Don’t remember the songs names, but when my brother I could first club together, we had a dance to it.
20) Your favorite song at this moment in time.
I put a spell on you – Nina Simone
It just puts me to sleep.
Monday, January 30, 2006
Ten Lines response.
It took One second for me to
Have visions of us Two
Meeting on Three planes of thought
Sharing Four-play
While screaming the Five syllables of your name
With my Six senses enthralled by
Seven soft kisses placed
On my Eight sweet spots
Sending me to cloud Nine.
All this from Ten feet away.
Peace
Have visions of us Two
Meeting on Three planes of thought
Sharing Four-play
While screaming the Five syllables of your name
With my Six senses enthralled by
Seven soft kisses placed
On my Eight sweet spots
Sending me to cloud Nine.
All this from Ten feet away.
Peace
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Untitled...pt. 3 the conclusion.
Okay... the big finish.
Well that night, after spending the whole day with Amber, and rushing up to be with my girlfriend was a trip. Not just with distance, but emotionally as well. There was a War brewing inside of me, the Heart and Mind had failed at coexistence. This war began to spill out on to the streets of my tongue, my actions, and my eyes. I'm not sure if my girlfriend saw this, but I felt as though it was as visible as the images from the the war in Iraq. Only my war had to end, for the only casualty would be me.
As the day turned to night, and we laid on the bed, I began to talk. Not about Amber, but moreso about my feelings. I weaved a tale that was partially of the mind, and partially of the heart. As a whole, it probably didn't make sense. I remember saying things like "I love you, but I'm not in love with you" and "sometimes I think I love you and can be with you forever, but sometimes I feel like I need time to myself." I'm sure to her none of what I said made much sense, but the tone of my speech painted the picture my word could not.
I only knew this as she began to cry. I had never made her cry before. I wished I could take back my words, but I couldn't it. Well I could say I didn't mean it, but like I said earlier, memories are hard the to lose. It was as those first tears fell, cutting a path down her cheek that my Heart began to loosen its strangle-hold on my Brain. I began to see what I was letting myself do to another person, a person I said I loved. I tried retracting some of my statements but the damage had been done. This would possibly be our last night together.
We laid there, holding each other as if we were attempting to keep warm in sub-zero weather, each of us wanting to give the other all the heat in our body, wanting to see them survive more than ourself. We fell asleep that way, and woke up that way.
The next day we knew what had to happen. I was gonna have to pack my close up and leave. So that's what I did. I no longer attempted to explain away my words of the night before, I only hugged her, and left.
I had decided to leave, leave Atlanta, and just go back home. My internal Civil War had again resembled the Iraq war, in the way that there will be no winner. All that had happened left me fatigued. I couldn't stand to be in the city any longer. Given my mental connection, Amber would likely see through me and I couldn't go through a repeat of the night before. I figured I would speak to them both when I got home.
It was days before I would contact either woman. I needed some time with myself, I had spent myself more than initially thought. My, now, ex-girlfriend had called my parents to find out about me, she had been concerned after not hearing from me. I eventually called her, we talked but the tension so thick that it made it to awkward to stay on the phone for very long.
And as for Amber, my feelings for her had frustrated me. I began to resent her, for where she had taken me to, mentally. I decided to cut it off, cold-turkey. Unfortunately that approach had sent me through withdrawal. I began with denial of her importance to me, I then moved onto mental and spiritual deterioration, followed by a reawakening in me. I finally reached the other side of the tunnel, acceptance of my actions.
With acceptance in hand I felt I had one last step to take, asking for forgiveness, and the chance to a fresh start with Amber. So I picked up pad and pen, and asked them to help release my thoughts. In the end we had created the most eloquent letter I had ever written, it must have been 4 or 5 pages long. But, in the end all it really described was my indiscretion, my lies, and my conniving ways, but it was written so well how could you stay mad? Easily I guess.
Days later my letter returned to me. I guess telling the truth, sometimes only gets you freedom.
Weeks later my now ex-girlfriend's internship ended and she returned back to school. Days later, we were dating again. I guess sometimes the shoe just fits you to good to let it go, no matter how many holes it has, or how beat up it is. I didn't tell her anything of Amber, but I promised myself I would if we ever decided to get married.
My girlfriend never heard the name Amber. And I never heard from Amber. Years later I would meet my wife, and move to Atlanta for work. Coincidentally, my job is less than a mile away from where Amber lived when I visited.
I've driven by once or twice. But it not on my path. Peace.
Well that night, after spending the whole day with Amber, and rushing up to be with my girlfriend was a trip. Not just with distance, but emotionally as well. There was a War brewing inside of me, the Heart and Mind had failed at coexistence. This war began to spill out on to the streets of my tongue, my actions, and my eyes. I'm not sure if my girlfriend saw this, but I felt as though it was as visible as the images from the the war in Iraq. Only my war had to end, for the only casualty would be me.
As the day turned to night, and we laid on the bed, I began to talk. Not about Amber, but moreso about my feelings. I weaved a tale that was partially of the mind, and partially of the heart. As a whole, it probably didn't make sense. I remember saying things like "I love you, but I'm not in love with you" and "sometimes I think I love you and can be with you forever, but sometimes I feel like I need time to myself." I'm sure to her none of what I said made much sense, but the tone of my speech painted the picture my word could not.
I only knew this as she began to cry. I had never made her cry before. I wished I could take back my words, but I couldn't it. Well I could say I didn't mean it, but like I said earlier, memories are hard the to lose. It was as those first tears fell, cutting a path down her cheek that my Heart began to loosen its strangle-hold on my Brain. I began to see what I was letting myself do to another person, a person I said I loved. I tried retracting some of my statements but the damage had been done. This would possibly be our last night together.
We laid there, holding each other as if we were attempting to keep warm in sub-zero weather, each of us wanting to give the other all the heat in our body, wanting to see them survive more than ourself. We fell asleep that way, and woke up that way.
The next day we knew what had to happen. I was gonna have to pack my close up and leave. So that's what I did. I no longer attempted to explain away my words of the night before, I only hugged her, and left.
I had decided to leave, leave Atlanta, and just go back home. My internal Civil War had again resembled the Iraq war, in the way that there will be no winner. All that had happened left me fatigued. I couldn't stand to be in the city any longer. Given my mental connection, Amber would likely see through me and I couldn't go through a repeat of the night before. I figured I would speak to them both when I got home.
It was days before I would contact either woman. I needed some time with myself, I had spent myself more than initially thought. My, now, ex-girlfriend had called my parents to find out about me, she had been concerned after not hearing from me. I eventually called her, we talked but the tension so thick that it made it to awkward to stay on the phone for very long.
And as for Amber, my feelings for her had frustrated me. I began to resent her, for where she had taken me to, mentally. I decided to cut it off, cold-turkey. Unfortunately that approach had sent me through withdrawal. I began with denial of her importance to me, I then moved onto mental and spiritual deterioration, followed by a reawakening in me. I finally reached the other side of the tunnel, acceptance of my actions.
With acceptance in hand I felt I had one last step to take, asking for forgiveness, and the chance to a fresh start with Amber. So I picked up pad and pen, and asked them to help release my thoughts. In the end we had created the most eloquent letter I had ever written, it must have been 4 or 5 pages long. But, in the end all it really described was my indiscretion, my lies, and my conniving ways, but it was written so well how could you stay mad? Easily I guess.
Days later my letter returned to me. I guess telling the truth, sometimes only gets you freedom.
Weeks later my now ex-girlfriend's internship ended and she returned back to school. Days later, we were dating again. I guess sometimes the shoe just fits you to good to let it go, no matter how many holes it has, or how beat up it is. I didn't tell her anything of Amber, but I promised myself I would if we ever decided to get married.
My girlfriend never heard the name Amber. And I never heard from Amber. Years later I would meet my wife, and move to Atlanta for work. Coincidentally, my job is less than a mile away from where Amber lived when I visited.
I've driven by once or twice. But it not on my path. Peace.
Untitled... Pt. 2
When I left off yesterday's posting you saw our star at the proverbial fork in the road. Having to either follow the path one, that I knew and recognized. Which was the path that I had traveled on for a while, now. I knew my limits on this path, I knew that all these affairs were only affairs of the body, not of the mind and spirit. Temporary boosts to a man self-esteem. I also knew that I could never have more than the occasional romp, with any of them. On this path I had convinced myself that I had already chosen my wife, all these "youthful indescretions" would not distract me from that goal.
Or, path two. This path seemed so bright, as though it had it's own Star. It looked like it had four paved lanes on which to travel. It appeared to be "new". "New," it was a word that conjured up infinite possibilities, or better yet, infinitely great possibilities. I felt enlightened just by thought of this path, a feeling that had been missing inside of me. Overjoyed with it's potential rewards. This could be my utopia.
Now let us continue...
5 days left. The idea of only having five days available to both, love and lose love, felt torturous. I felt cheated, not just by time, but also by circumstance.
The win' up tones of reggae music played the soundtrack to our night. My existing relationship was, at that point in time, doing just that, existing. I wasn't living in it. I was living in a moment, something my rigid, and analytical nature had never allowed me to do before. I was at a place in my Mind that I hadn't visited before, it euphoric. I was so "out" that thoughts of marriage entered my head. But like great things, this night had to end.
It was close to closing time. I had looked at my watch at times during the night, as though I were counting down the inevitable. I, soon began to fall back into my analyzing state. Weighing the options, that this night had availed me. My Mind fought my Heart's attempt to be involved in the decision making process. It became a battle of reason versus feeling, and after minutes, which felt like hours or days of internal conflict, the Heart had won.
We exchanged numbers, as well as kisses. Kissing at the club, especially someone you just met, had been forbidden act in my mind. But this was a person I had known my whole life, metaphysically speaking.
The next day we spoke on the phone, our conversation came as effortlessly as the previous nights kiss had. We discussed our schedules for the upcoming week, and when we would have to time to see each other. As though God had wanted to conduct some sort of cruel experiment on human nature, we discovered our times synched up perfectly. This was rare given that I typically worked nights at my job at the Gas Station, but due to a recent firing, I had be asked to work the day shift. Allowing us most of the evenings to enjoy each others company.
Our evening consisted of me picking her up from her dorms, and us visiting various spots around the city. I moved around the city as though I didn't have a girlfriend, or as if Tallahassee wasn't a small enough city for me to bump into the wrong (girlfriends girl-friends) people. I didn't care though, I was "in love." We would spend our nights by my apartment, discussing any thing from high-fructose corn syrup to places we wanted to visit. But we never talked about Friday.
Friday would be the day she would be leaving me and returning to Atlanta. And although we were only 5 hours apart, to a broke college student with a fickle car, we might as well have 5 states apart.
But in the meantime we enjoyed our moments together. She stayed the night every night, but not once did either of us feel pressured, or pressure each other to consumate our relationship by engaging in sex. Just the act of being together had satisfied that need in my 22 year old body.
I would speak to my girlfriend during the day, primarily while at work. Being that she was in Atlanta and that it was a time before cell phones were popular, so a lot of checking up of my whereabouts wasn't possible. Though, I probably would've found ways around her, even if she were in town.
Thursday came, and we both knew the would quite possibly be our last night together. We still acted as though she lived 5 miles away, exchanging addresses, phone numbers, and directions, as though we intended to see each other on Saturday. We were still living on Fantasy Island, oblivious to the truth. The truth that I still had 2 years of school left, that she had some difficult semesters of law school to complete, and that long distance relationships don't work. But we went through the "this isn't good-bye" motions anyways.
The climax....
So my "new" love had come and gone, and I was feeling everything my Mind had told my Heart it would feel. We spoke on the phone, still overly optimistic about what our future could hold. I had slowly returned back to my usual self, but with a greater degree of consciousness about certain things, which I attribute to my week in Bliss. My relationship with my girlfriend had never skipped a beat. I was good at that, living in two places at once, maybe it's the Gemini in me. I was somehow able to walk both paths at once. A couple of weeks later, I even made plans to travel to Atlanta to go see "them".
I had tried hard to shake of the heavy aroma of a love and life that I could never have. But I couldn't, it was now apart of my memories, and for years I had tried to "lose memories" that had no use for, or that pained me to think of.
I traveled to Atlanta soon after. I had been invited up by my girlfriend, and I probably could have gotten around not seeing my "new" love, but it seemed as though the closer I got to the city, the more my Heart beat to a rhythm. A rhythm that seemed to be sort of a Morse Code..... A.m-b-e.r.... My Mind had not been prepared for this and had to succumb.
I then became frazzled, if thats a word, operating only on emotion, which is never a good thing. I contacted Amber as soon as I came in town. I had to see her, and since she lived on the south side of town, it would be easy to see her on my way up to the northside of town where my girlfriend was living.
Make sense, right? Not really, because I was supposed to meet my girlfriend after she got off work so that we could go to Six Flags with some of her co-workers. And me not giving the consideration to distance or traffic, I was destined to be late. But when I got to Amber's apartment I threw all that out of the window.
I was back on my drug of choice. And like when on most drugs, time just floated by, I forgot all my problems and responsibilities, and also, did whatever I could to stay "high". Amber and I drove around parts of Atlanta, went to a Jamaican restaurant, by the M. L. King Center, Olympic Park. It was close to 5 p.m. before I realized that I needed to start leaving to prepare for my 6:30 p.m. meeting time. It wasn't until 5:45 that I left. I just couldn't pull myself away.
With traffic and the rush hour commute, it was 7:30 p.m. before I got where I needed to be, much later than I should've been. Needless to say, we didn't get to go to Six Flags. Luckily I had a Sister that lived in town that I could blame for my tardiness. We decided to stay in for the night, and although physically in Kennesaw, my Heart was in College Park. And at some point that night, I decided I couldn't walk on these paths anymore...
** This story is much longer than I intended and I still have a bit left to share. I know I stated that a conclusion would be drawn today, but didn't expect all of this. I promise to finish by later today. Peace. **
Or, path two. This path seemed so bright, as though it had it's own Star. It looked like it had four paved lanes on which to travel. It appeared to be "new". "New," it was a word that conjured up infinite possibilities, or better yet, infinitely great possibilities. I felt enlightened just by thought of this path, a feeling that had been missing inside of me. Overjoyed with it's potential rewards. This could be my utopia.
Now let us continue...
5 days left. The idea of only having five days available to both, love and lose love, felt torturous. I felt cheated, not just by time, but also by circumstance.
The win' up tones of reggae music played the soundtrack to our night. My existing relationship was, at that point in time, doing just that, existing. I wasn't living in it. I was living in a moment, something my rigid, and analytical nature had never allowed me to do before. I was at a place in my Mind that I hadn't visited before, it euphoric. I was so "out" that thoughts of marriage entered my head. But like great things, this night had to end.
It was close to closing time. I had looked at my watch at times during the night, as though I were counting down the inevitable. I, soon began to fall back into my analyzing state. Weighing the options, that this night had availed me. My Mind fought my Heart's attempt to be involved in the decision making process. It became a battle of reason versus feeling, and after minutes, which felt like hours or days of internal conflict, the Heart had won.
We exchanged numbers, as well as kisses. Kissing at the club, especially someone you just met, had been forbidden act in my mind. But this was a person I had known my whole life, metaphysically speaking.
The next day we spoke on the phone, our conversation came as effortlessly as the previous nights kiss had. We discussed our schedules for the upcoming week, and when we would have to time to see each other. As though God had wanted to conduct some sort of cruel experiment on human nature, we discovered our times synched up perfectly. This was rare given that I typically worked nights at my job at the Gas Station, but due to a recent firing, I had be asked to work the day shift. Allowing us most of the evenings to enjoy each others company.
Our evening consisted of me picking her up from her dorms, and us visiting various spots around the city. I moved around the city as though I didn't have a girlfriend, or as if Tallahassee wasn't a small enough city for me to bump into the wrong (girlfriends girl-friends) people. I didn't care though, I was "in love." We would spend our nights by my apartment, discussing any thing from high-fructose corn syrup to places we wanted to visit. But we never talked about Friday.
Friday would be the day she would be leaving me and returning to Atlanta. And although we were only 5 hours apart, to a broke college student with a fickle car, we might as well have 5 states apart.
But in the meantime we enjoyed our moments together. She stayed the night every night, but not once did either of us feel pressured, or pressure each other to consumate our relationship by engaging in sex. Just the act of being together had satisfied that need in my 22 year old body.
I would speak to my girlfriend during the day, primarily while at work. Being that she was in Atlanta and that it was a time before cell phones were popular, so a lot of checking up of my whereabouts wasn't possible. Though, I probably would've found ways around her, even if she were in town.
Thursday came, and we both knew the would quite possibly be our last night together. We still acted as though she lived 5 miles away, exchanging addresses, phone numbers, and directions, as though we intended to see each other on Saturday. We were still living on Fantasy Island, oblivious to the truth. The truth that I still had 2 years of school left, that she had some difficult semesters of law school to complete, and that long distance relationships don't work. But we went through the "this isn't good-bye" motions anyways.
The climax....
So my "new" love had come and gone, and I was feeling everything my Mind had told my Heart it would feel. We spoke on the phone, still overly optimistic about what our future could hold. I had slowly returned back to my usual self, but with a greater degree of consciousness about certain things, which I attribute to my week in Bliss. My relationship with my girlfriend had never skipped a beat. I was good at that, living in two places at once, maybe it's the Gemini in me. I was somehow able to walk both paths at once. A couple of weeks later, I even made plans to travel to Atlanta to go see "them".
I had tried hard to shake of the heavy aroma of a love and life that I could never have. But I couldn't, it was now apart of my memories, and for years I had tried to "lose memories" that had no use for, or that pained me to think of.
I traveled to Atlanta soon after. I had been invited up by my girlfriend, and I probably could have gotten around not seeing my "new" love, but it seemed as though the closer I got to the city, the more my Heart beat to a rhythm. A rhythm that seemed to be sort of a Morse Code..... A.m-b-e.r.... My Mind had not been prepared for this and had to succumb.
I then became frazzled, if thats a word, operating only on emotion, which is never a good thing. I contacted Amber as soon as I came in town. I had to see her, and since she lived on the south side of town, it would be easy to see her on my way up to the northside of town where my girlfriend was living.
Make sense, right? Not really, because I was supposed to meet my girlfriend after she got off work so that we could go to Six Flags with some of her co-workers. And me not giving the consideration to distance or traffic, I was destined to be late. But when I got to Amber's apartment I threw all that out of the window.
I was back on my drug of choice. And like when on most drugs, time just floated by, I forgot all my problems and responsibilities, and also, did whatever I could to stay "high". Amber and I drove around parts of Atlanta, went to a Jamaican restaurant, by the M. L. King Center, Olympic Park. It was close to 5 p.m. before I realized that I needed to start leaving to prepare for my 6:30 p.m. meeting time. It wasn't until 5:45 that I left. I just couldn't pull myself away.
With traffic and the rush hour commute, it was 7:30 p.m. before I got where I needed to be, much later than I should've been. Needless to say, we didn't get to go to Six Flags. Luckily I had a Sister that lived in town that I could blame for my tardiness. We decided to stay in for the night, and although physically in Kennesaw, my Heart was in College Park. And at some point that night, I decided I couldn't walk on these paths anymore...
** This story is much longer than I intended and I still have a bit left to share. I know I stated that a conclusion would be drawn today, but didn't expect all of this. I promise to finish by later today. Peace. **
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